so im in a bit of weird place…

thank you Tom...

thank you Tom...


A while back, John (my husband) was driving to work around 6:45am and saw an old man hitchhiking down west second…being that he was old, small and a bit drunk..John picked him up, the guy asked for a ride to shari’s and filled up Johns gas tank, which led him to believe this guy was probably decent..through the 8 min. drive, John learned that his name was Tom and he was 73 and his wife died october 8th and 1:04 in the morning, and he was desperately sad. We’ve gone by several times to check up on him and shovel his driveway, bring cookies and company etc..and over this course he has come to the conclusion we are the last two decent people in McMinnville (not true but sweet nonetheless) and has decided also, that he wants to pass on to me, all of his wifes sewing/crafting things. At first I was so not into that, it just seemed so weird, and felt like I was stealing or taking advantage of an old, sad widow, but then, since no one took anything, he literally threw away her two thousand dollar serger and computerized janome sewing machines…ACK! I was so bummed! So…on saturday John and I went by and he gave us, count them…1 2 3 4 5 garbage cans stuffed chock full of fabric and batting and pillow forms, emroidary hoops…you name it! And now he wants me to come over and help him go through the rest of  her stuff and take it, but I feel so weird still…doesnt that seem weird? Im thinking I will pack up everything that looks sentimental or important and put it in his storage without him knowing, and dump the trash and take the things that truly are worth giving away (i.e. sewing needles, ribbon etc)…what do you think? He wont talk about kids, says dont ask, but I know they both have some so I want to save the important things. Im also afraid that in a year, when the grieving starts to lessen, he’ll really regret giving away all his memories of her. And he often talks about how he gets drunk and just gives stuff away that he can’t remember…he gave me literally ALL of her jewelry, which i categorized into little baggies and I think im just gonna hang on to and not touch…cause i have this sneaking suspicion that he or one of his related will want that, some pieces are incredibly vintage and lots of junk, but nonetheless, I would want my mothers old jewelry, not some girl who never knew her…anyways..comment please!


3 thoughts on “Quandary…

  1. Hello Sophia,
    Is the first time I’ve seen your blog, and this story has caught my heart. I think your husband and you are very good people. IS not usual to stop to pick up a stranger.
    He felt so sad and you are there, giving your support to him. I think he is happy giving to you all the craft form her wife, because he knows you will aprecciate it, and you will make beautiful things with them.
    Is so hopeful to see that it exists people like you and your husband.
    My best wishes for all of you,


    (Sorry for my English I’m from Barcelona, and I don’t speak very well)

  2. Elena! how awesome to hear from someone from Barcelona!! I hear its beautiful, and there’s even a movie that takes place in it (vicky cristina Barcelona)…thank you so much for your comment, I certainly hope we’re helping…

  3. Your story brought tears to my eyes. I think it’s amazing that you are helping him and I understand the weirdness but I truly think he knows what he is doing. For some people, removing signs of a loved one helps them cope with loss and move forward with life.

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